day 136. XI

she missed him the way she would look for coffee in the morning —
her life was incomplete without it
but she has not heard from him anymore
maybe he was happier without her
maybe he had realized she was not really worth it
maybe he had found somebody else
she did not want to stop when she told him she would
she hoped he would tell her not to stop
but he never did
perhaps she understood differently
perhaps she was really not the type you’d fight for
perhaps she was just not the better choice
perhaps it was all for the best